Wow, it sure has been a long time since I've written...thought it was about time to write something new.
Life is crazy as usual and so much has happened and been on my mind. Life still continues to be a challenge, but in the midst of all the struggles I find light and happiness. As this semester of college rolls close to the end, I'm finding I really need to step up and take control of my studies. I suppose I may have, possibly slacked off, and it is starting to show. I am constantly having to swallow my pride and ask for help from my instructors and often times resulting in feeling stupid for not knowing something that seems so simple. After two semesters (one whole year) of college life and with-holding a 4.0 GPA I am now humbled and feeling slightly humiliated as I am getting the lowest grades I have ever gotten in college. I got my first F the other day and I felt like it tore me up inside leaving me very distraught. In and of myself I am nothing and fail greatly; however, I find while seeking God I find strength to do things I never thought possible.
Time to register for the upcoming Fall semester is right around the corner, so I find myself thinking and contemplating, trying to figure out what classes would be good for me to take. A part of me only wants to take a couple classes and take it easy...while the other part of me wants to head full-on into the new semester--making new goals to accomplish and more complete dreams to chase. As of now, I am looking at taking Spanish 2, Creative Writing, and possibly Digital Photography. That will take me to eleven units and I need twelve to be full-time. Although, the photography class is only for pleasure...it does not apply to my major, so I may need to hold off on that and do something that will benefit me in my major.
I am finding that dreams are constantly changing...even if it is slightly. In the beginning of the semester I was so set on school, it was as if I couldn't get enough of it. Now, I just don't know what I want. Sometimes I wish I didn't have to go to school anymore so I can just stay at home and study up on one specific subject that I would like to write a book about and get started up on it, but other times I think it would be great to have a degree. Life is full of so many decisions. Not that I could actually drop out of school, that just isn't an option...so I guess I meant to say that life is full of so many ideas and desires. Anyways...I am waiting patiently for God to show me which way He has planned for my life, which classes I should take and so-forth.
I am going to start to play tennis with a friend, which I am SURE will help me out with my stress and help me to just have fun. I am looking forward to it!
Lately I have been taking tons of photos, which really seems to cheer me up when I am down. It's as if God uses nature to show me His presence and hold me in His embrace. Here are some photos I have taken.
