What do I study in school?
What type of career should I aim for?
Do I try to get a job now? (Even though I fail at every attempt.)
What if I never get married? What do I do with my life then? Do I live with my parents forever?!
I'm not getting any younger!!
How am I supposed to know what to do or where to go?
All this made me feel lost and scared . . . maybe even a little crazy. I was always changing my major and was constantly searching for different jobs. Although, I could not find anything. Even the fast-food jobs didn't want me . . . I just don't have enough experience. I was just never happy with where I was at in life. I had no sense of peace in each direction I began to take. One path led to another path . . . and sometimes it seemed as though they went around in circles.
I was often so lost and confused that I felt as though I was a frightened child trapped in a woman's body . . . if that even makes any sense at all.
I often wrote about all this here in my blog. How I felt like I was wandering around aimlessly without any sense of direction.
I must say, though, that even though I am still unsure about most of those questions, I am extremely happy with where I am in my life right now.
I have never had so much peace about what I was studying in school. I am taking three classes and have made it through more than half the semester and am still excited about school and learning. I'm even looking forward to next semester already!! I signed up for a summer class, which I have always said I would NEVER do!
I know that even though I can't get a job right now, I am still working my way there. I think it is very important to focus more on classes right now anyway.
I am learning a lot with computers right now. I don't know exactly what I will do with all this when I'm through with getting my associates degree, but I'm sure I can use all this for something great.
I believe that I may never know exactly where to go. I won't know what to do all the time or know what path leads where. But if I take it all one step at a time, with the Lord by my side, I will eventually make it to the finish line.
I am so thankful for my family and my close friends who have been here for me through all this. They have been so encouraging and patient with me as I try to find my way.
