When I was little I was extremely shy. I could hardly express my true self to even my mom. I so badly wanted to come out, as I was lost inside of myself. I wanted to believe I was a human being like anybody else. I wanted to feel like I had a place to belong...I always felt so lonely. I wanted to feel excepted so bad that I made very bad friends, they abused me emotionally and physically. To this day I have a hard time letting go of the past and the pain I felt long ago. I am learning to live my life in the now and just trust in the Lord and hope in the fact that he has made me a new person and that all old things are passed away.
My past seems to hang over me
Like a dark cloud in the sky.
Such a dark memory,
When in the night I would cry.
Many years I have wasted
As I struggled to find my way.
The pain I felt before
Comes to me like rain to pour.
Why must it haunt me so?
This I may never know.
In my dreams I see the darkness;
The loneliness I felt so long ago.
In the dark night it haunts me.
Please, Lord, in the past let it go!
No longer will I live in darkness...
Living only in faith and trust.
The future may seem so unsure,
But God's love for me is, oh, so pure.
Knowing he has my best at hand,
I will follow his command.
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