One Year

If you were told you had one year left to live . . . what would you do?

How would you live it?

What would you be thinking and feeling?

These questions have been going through my mind ever since I heard the news that my grandpa has a rare cancer that cannot be operated on . . . leaving him with only about one year left to live.

I definitely do not know how I would react to such a difficult situation. Would I fall apart? Or would I stay strong until the very end . . . doing all I can to make that one year really count?

Another question that consumes my mind is . . .

What do you do when someone you love with all your heart only has one year left to live?

Lately, I have been extremely distraught over the news of my grandpa's recently found cancer. I cried just at the thought of life without him when I heard what the doctor had told him.

I always imagined my grandpa being at my wedding whenever that special day would come for me.

I pictured him there when I have my first child, if God ever blesses me with any. Holding him/her in his lap and playing around just like he would do when I was a small child.

I have so many wonderful memories that I will hold onto and cherish forever.

In the time that I have left with my grandpa I want to take in every moment that I spend with him. I want to see his smiling face and etch it in my mind and heart so that I'll never forget it.

I cannot . . . MUST NOT let the sadness consume the time I spend with him.

I want to make this time count . . .

Sometimes . . .

Sometimes things don't turn out the way you always thought or expected they would.

Sometimes our heart breaks and we don't understand what good can come of it.

Sometimes everything around us seems to be changing and we don't recognize what we are to do in our life anymore.

Sometimes we feel alone.

But the reality of it is . . . God is still there and HE knows where we are to go. He will  never change. We just need to trust him and follow where he leads us . . . even when we are surrounded by the fog.

A very good friend of mine said to me . . .

"I know it looks like nothing will be the same but I can tell you it may not but what God has planned is much better."

I really needed to hear that.

So thankful to have a never changing, all knowing, caring and loving God. I am so blessed.

I am extremely grateful to have a wonderful family and godly friends who always remind me of God's hand in everything!